Betrayal

Photo by Aleks Dahlberg on Unsplash
Betrayal is failure to loyalty. It is the cause of pain, resentment, anger, stress, doubt, fear to trust and love again, regret, the list is endless.

I find myself drowning in the Mediterranean sea, where the storm and the waves are the living shadows of betrayers reflecting and revealing the truth. The truth of their intended intentions unknown to thyself, the truth that serves the provoked seldom sharks my body, the truth that cuts off all my limbs to disable me from survival.

It is in the sea where I cannot walk away from the pain, where I cannot seek answers to my questions- How we got here? How I got myself here? How I could not see the red flags from the beginning? Why I am suddenly a bull shark's snack attack? ...
I wish they had told me how they feel, what they wanted from me, and the reason they chose me. I wish I could blame myself, but I can never turn my back on myself. I wish to remember the good memories created and shared, but my broken, bruised heart does not allow me. There is so much resentment within me that drives a fear to trust them again, let alone anyone. I took a risk trusting someone with my own heart- I guess that is something I can blame myself for. I made a mistake not preparing for any storms or attacks that are now lashed at me. I made a mistake forgetting that I was dealing with humans and not the perfect breathless beings. And I made a mistake loving and caring wholeheartedly, instead of applying my chess game capabilities.

Yes, it hurts because it is not something done by my enemies but by my loved ones. I am still living with trauma, fear and doubt, but is it worth it fighting for the dead? Is it worth it proving them right? Is it worth it revenging against them? Is it? I strongly do not think so.

As much as I was betrayed and as much as it is taking too long for my heart to heal, I will heal. I will let go of the past. I will learn from this experience. I will do much better next time- there is hope. I will secure my heart. I will control my emotions. And I will TRUST only in the Lord, and give him all my worries, but seek his Kingdom first.

I forgive them.


THE END!

Comments

  1. MargaretMay 24, 2019 at 9:00 PM

    Such a heart touching post. The way people treat you is a reflection of them. Don't let it destroy your inner peace. Forgive and move on

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kylie VilakaziMay 24, 2019 at 9:11 PM

      Indeed Margaret. Thank you for the advice, I will keep that in mind.

      Delete
  2. masaneh promiseMay 24, 2019 at 9:58 PM

    Great piece. You know most of the time those who betray you are the only ones you trust. What I have learned in life is tto stop trusting human beings but looking up to my creator. Your best friend is someone else's best friend. Believe in yourself!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kylie VilakaziMay 25, 2019 at 1:10 AM

      So true Promise. I felt it when you said, "Your best friend is someone else's best friend".

      Delete
  3. Katlego ModjadjiMay 24, 2019 at 11:46 PM

    This is touching I really needed to read this,i relate to your story Kylie. Just be strong and put everything in god's hand

    ReplyDelete
  4. Marie KasongoMay 24, 2019 at 11:48 PM

    So touching, but wat I know is to never put ur trust in man as the Bible says but always trust in the most high he'll never betray you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. UnknownMay 25, 2019 at 1:38 AM

    You cannot do anything about what is said or done to you, but true power is seen by how you react or respond. Controlling your emotions that's a great reaction. Great!

    ReplyDelete
  6. MPILOMay 25, 2019 at 4:54 AM

    Wow😎 this is reality and I can relate to the blog post.

    I have been betrayed by the people I loved and trusted.

    It seems as if when you wrote this blog you had me in mind. Betrayal is real and exists.

    You are a good write Kylie and I can't wait for the next blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kylie VilakaziMay 25, 2019 at 7:03 AM

      I'm glad you could relate and thank you. I can't wat to publish another post too😊😊

      Delete
    2. MPILOMay 25, 2019 at 7:17 AM

      Please do so as soon as possible.

      Delete
    3. Kylie VilakaziMay 25, 2019 at 7:23 AM

      I got you.

      Delete
  7. UnknownMay 25, 2019 at 6:01 AM

    Beautiful

    ReplyDelete
  8. iSharonMay 25, 2019 at 8:19 AM

    Forgiveness is for you than the pain causer....

    ReplyDelete
  9. AddieMay 27, 2019 at 10:21 AM

    Someone told me that you shouldn't let people show you they don't want you in their lives twice. People closer to you are the ones who hurt you the most... cause they know you too well. So learn your lesson once and never give them another chance to do that.

    Great post Kylie xxx

    ReplyDelete
  10. SimzMay 28, 2019 at 7:42 AM

    Wow This is so touching but at the end of the day i think we should be able to forgive and move on

    ReplyDelete
  11. UnknownMay 31, 2019 at 5:41 PM

    You were born for this. Waay too good for words to describe. Truly touched. Thank you for this❤️

    ReplyDelete
  12. Phuti P MokitleJune 19, 2019 at 9:31 AM

    The reality of betrayal and the deep end of it is a common thing in human nature the only difference is learning how we individually put to practice our spiritual principles to overcome betrayal and I resonate a lot with your post because the answer is our Lord and Saviour! Amazing

    ReplyDelete

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